The Secret to Teaching Kids How to Earn Their Own Money

art_1009_msk.jpg"Hey Dad, it's only twenty dollars..." Jack's plaintive pre-teen voice comes from behind the video games display.

Dad responds with a chuckle. "Funny, your mother left video games off this week's shopping list."

Most parents don't have to be in a store with their child very long to hear "Daaadd... look...it's on sale," or, "Just use your credit card, " or, "Why don't you go get more money at the bank, Mommy?" It's no wonder many parents resist going to the store with their children - they can avoid chronic requests for things not on the family shopping list.

Familiar requests like these, while seemingly annoying, can become a parent's best friend. Instead of feeling like the bad guy and having to say "no" (again), parents can turn each shopping trip into a teaching moment with a different kind of list altogether: a "job list."

A job list is a list of age-appropriate household tasks that give kids opportunities to earn their own money. A job list differs from a chore list.  Jobs are non-essential, optional tasks like weeding, sweeping out the garage or washing the car.  Chores, on the other hand, are essential to day-to-day living, e.g., feeding the family pet, taking out the trash, and washing the dishes. In addition, jobs are paid work; chores, or contributions, are unpaid work kids do because they are family members.

See September's column (www.northstateparent.com/moneysmartkids.html) to learn about the pitfalls of paying kids for completing chores. Many parents think, "I get paid for the work I do, why not use household chores to teach the payment-for-work concept to my child?" While paying for chores may seem like a good idea in theory, in practice paying kids to complete their chores leaves the door open for manipulation, power struggles and frustration on both sides of the equation. We don't pay ourselves for doing our own household chores, so don't pay your children for doing their fair share. Doing chores is part of being in a family.

A "job list" more accurately fosters the payment-for-work concept. Parents can teach the concept more effectively, and with a lot less headache, by using a job list instead of a chore list. If adults have the means, we pay others to do the housework we don't want to do or have time to do, e.g., washing the windows, pulling weeds, raking leaves or shoveling snow. These are perfect items for a job list. In our example, there's no reason for Jack's father to hire the neighbor's son to sweep out the garage when Jack can do the job to earn money for the video game he keeps asking for.

In short, we can train and pay our kids to do the jobs we don't want to do and to do our chores, but we don't pay them to do their chores.

How does a parent get started using a job list?

Here's how Jack's father introduced the idea to Jack:

 

Dad: "Jack, I put a list of jobs you can do around the house on the refrigerator if you ever want to earn your own money."

Jack: "How much can I get?"

Dad: "That's negotiable. It depends on what kind of job you do, and whether I need to help you or if you can do it all by yourself."

Jack: "I get allowance, so I probably won't need any more money."

Dad: "Okay, I just wanted to let you know it's there if or when you want more money."

Anticipating their next trip to the store that very afternoon, Dad smiles. A job list is the best kind of referral a parent can have on hand in the land of materialistic desires. Jack's perception may seem right for now, but that will change in a few hours when he again wanders by the video game rack. This time Dad has a fall-back position: he will refer Jack to the list on the refrigerator as an answer to "It's only...," or, "It's on sale..." This will work, of course, only if Dad keeps his wallet closed.

A few hours later, Dad's heading for the check-out stand when Jack rushes up to him holding out a video game.

Jack: "Dad, can I can buy...?"

Dad: "Sure."

Jack: "But I don't have enough money. Can I have my allowance early this week?"

Dad: "You already know the answer to that. I give allowances out on Sundays. Today is Friday."

Jack: "What difference does two days make?"

Dad remembers his Love and Logic method of neutralizing arguments and responds softly: "Love you too much to argue."

Jack: "But..."

Dad: "Why don't you check out that job list when we get home? Then you can decide what the video game is worth to you."

Offering your child the chance to earn his or her own money from a very young age provides opportunities that help prepare your child for the future; it gives your child the chance to earn what he or she wants through effort, patience and perseverance.
A jobs list gives kids opportunities to:

  • Earn money
  • Learn a new skill set
  • Delay gratification
  • Learn the difference between needs and wants
  • Learn time and money management skills
  • Develop a work ethic
  • Develop gratitude for what others do for them at home

Not a bad list of bennies for one simple tool!

So next time you hear, "It's only $20...," think of it as a great opportunity to give your kids the experience of earning what they want, or to live without.

For tips about on-the-job training at home, how much to pay, and job list suggestions for preschoolers to teens, check out "Millionaire Babies or Bankrupt Brats? Love and Logic Solutions to Teaching Kids About Money," that I co-authored with Jim Fay.

Once kids earn their own money, the next logical step is to teach them the benefits of saving some of it. Look for my upcoming November column: Teaching Kids to Save - A Gift that Keeps on Giving.